Picture of the Day: Silent Against Domestic Violence

Posted on April 21, 2007
Filed Under >Adil Najam, Photo of the Day, Society, Women
85 Comments
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Adil Najam

Sometimes one is left completely speechless. And I was upon seeing this picture in the Daily Times (21 April) of a man beating his wife as their son looks on.


But the real story here is about a society that chooses to loose its speech and prefers to remain silent in the face of a wide scale menace of acute domestic violence and spousal (and familial) abuse of women.

This is not something that is restricted only to the poorest classes. Although it is often hidden behind ‘sufaid poshi’ such violence against women is more common in our society than most of us would care to accept. Remember, for example, the case of former Pakistan cricket captain Moin Khan who was taken in custody after beating his wife while drunk.

I wonder what the child in this photograph will grow up thinking. I wonder how many children have grown up witnessing such scenes. I wonder what such emotional scars have done to them.

It is indeed true that such incidents of violence happen all over the world. There is no evidence at all that they happen more in Pakistan than elsewhere. In terms of reported cases they may be even less. But that is not the point. This is not a competition.

Saying that it happens everywhere or that it happens even more in other places is neither an excuse nor a consolation. One case would, in my opinion, be one too many. And there are clearly much more than one. As Pakistanis – no, as human beings – we must speak against such violence everywhere; but, first within our own society.

85 responses to “Picture of the Day: Silent Against Domestic Violence”

  1. Rafay Kashmiri says:

    @Akbar A.H,

    to begin with,

    Lazim hay keh ham bhi dekhain gay…….(long-term)

    84 comments with some thunderings, but
    it was’nt too bad, don’t you think ?

  2. Kashif Maqsood says:

    Kilaasik –
    In a discussion around domestic violence perhaps it might make sense to discuss a solution or perhaps use this as an advertising space for those that are doing good work in this area. Anyone have any thoughts in this area?

    -K

  3. Rafay Kashmiri says:

    82 comments on a commentable topic

    @ Its been a year since this thread got into a very
    tight and narrow vigilance, and I was wondering did
    anyone catch the main reason for this domestic violence,
    atleast in Pakistan.

    Probably the main theme mingled with extra hyperactive arguments over men or women responsible for such anomaly.

    Well, we do miss something here very obvious and that is the absence of moral disuasive tactics in the society in order to prevent such disaster.

    You have to admit that violence is ‘bell et bien’ present 24 hours to such ferocity that a simple verbal argument turnup into a battle scene, one giving, the other receiving punches, kicks and fists, the process is somewhere disrupted by sudden reaction of apparently men who decides
    to use physical hitting on women, a moral can intervene and
    prevent this drama, but beating has no moral reason where
    as verbal arguments could be handled in the most decent
    way, for that ” A MORAL ” is required to intervene and
    prevent some one not to go too far.

    The only factor capable to do is Islamic morals in a family or between a couple or among friends, neighbours colleagues.

    A muslim is suppose to holdon to his/her anger, as hundreds
    of ahadith quoting anger as evil and destructor ,being the
    base root of violence, we have to consider the psycological
    deficiencies in human faculties as well.
    In general, all the religious morals have their reserves on the matter.

    What Pakistani society needs is return to old Islamic etiquetts, adab-o-adaam, lehaz, sharm, haya and
    zabaan, let your children call you ” aap ” and you to them
    as well, then you can see the difference.
    Myself I always adressed my Parents ( Allah maghfirah)
    with AAP even when I became father of three, but they also
    adressed me always with AAP, in turn, me and my kids use
    always AAP, we never go into angry arguments (Alhamdulilah)
    WE NEVER EVER USED ” TU TUM ” at home.

  4. YLH says:

    “is hamam mey hum sub nangay hain”

    So we shouldn’t do anything about it… we shouldn’t try and clothe ourselves. We should start by asking ourselves some serious questions…

  5. MQ sahab aap jaise jalil-ul-qadar shakhsiat hamesha mere dil k qareeb rahti hain.

    You missed the point. Saif that my recommendation were offensive and in reply i referred one of your reply to me. Only God knows or YOU that whether you were offending me at that time or not but I didn’t consider it offensive. I remember I in return asked that whether you were author of the book but then you got busy in your ‘qalanderiat’ and didn’t get time to reply me back.

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