If, like myself, you are parents of children growing up ‘abroad,’ then we probably share a common angst if our children do not or cannot speak our native language.
Having grown up outside of Pakistan my entire life, save numerous long summers during early schooling years and then later, almost bi-annual winters during college and thereafter, I am able to converse and understand spoken Urdu. It is thanks to my parents, who spoke Urdu throughout my young formative years, and our visits to the motherland, that I am able today, to appreciate more of my rich culture because I have the ability to communicate and comprehend Urdu. My wish and hope is that my children too, are able to have this wonderful gift and opportunity. In the world we now live in, especially for our American/foreign born children, the need for them to have a strong sense of belonging and a positive self-identity in the western societies they live in, is paramount in my opinion.
As a parent of two young children, my husband & I constantly struggle with the fact that our children are not speaking Urdu. We think they understand the language in some minimal capacity, but not nearly enough to elicit proper comprehension or more far flung verbal communication. We – or rather I – think they are in reality absorbing more than we give them credit for, but the reality is that it is not a two way road (yet). I am an optimist in this regard. It really boils down to whether or not we as parents make a consistent effort to actually SPEAK to each other in Urdu, and therefore with our children.
It has been noted that even in households where parents speak Urdu, the children living abroad either stop speaking their native language soon after entering preschool, KG, etc. or never felt comfortable speaking it at all. So, if your children don’t speak Urdu either because you as a parent are not using it as the first language of communication in the household, or even if you are, and your children still either cannot or refuse to, I still feel that there is good in continuing to speak.
There are a lot of theories and much evidence that while children may not speak their native language, if they are around it and hear it being spoken, their young minds may be absorbing more than you think. Language acquisition begins from birth. Many linguistic experts agree for the most part that the years from birth to before puberty is when the brain is able to absorb the most language, as well as the proper accent and more ‘native-like’ fluency and pronounciation. This is considered the ‘critical’ or the milder term, ‘optimal’ period for first and second language acquisition.
Psycholinguists and cognitive scientists have debated this ‘critical period hypothesis’ quite enthusiastically (from: ‘Cognitive Scientists on Bilingual Education’, UPI, Steve Sailer – October 27, 2000):
MIT linguist Noam Chomsky is famous for demonstrating that children are born with an innate ability to learn words and grammar. He suggests caution on the subject but pointed out, ‘There is no dispute about the fact that pre-puberty (in fact, much earlier), children have unusual facility in acquiring new languages.’
Chomsky’s younger MIT colleague, cognitive scientist Steven Pinker, [now at Harvard] author of the bestsellers ‘The Language Instinct’ and ‘How the Mind Works, states, ‘When it comes to learning a second language, the younger the better. In a large study of Chinese immigrants who entered the U.S. at different ages, those who arrived after puberty showed the worst English language skills. Still, this finding of ‘younger is better’ extended to far younger ages. People who began to learn English at six ended up on average more proficient than those who began at seven, and so on.’ As an illustration, Pinker points to the famously thick German accent of former Secretary of State Henry Kissinger, who arrived in America at age fourteen. In contrast, his younger brother developed a standard American accent.
Pinker’s arch-rival, Terrence W. Deacon, a biological anthropologist at Boston University and author of ‘The Symbolic Species’ replies, ‘I have to agree with Steve Pinker[on this one particular issue]that learning a language early in life can be an advantage for developing language fluency and sophistication.’
I know from personal experience, that languages in which I was immersed or were spoken to during the ‘critical period’ years, are still with me, and seem to possess the ability to speak with minimal non-native accent. I lived in Thailand until age 14 and also learned French in elementary school (as well as being exposed to French in Laos-French IndoChina- during ages 5-9). Almost 2 decades later I can still converse to some coherent degree in those languages. I learned Spanish in my mid-twenties, and many (!) years later, I can barely remember 5-10 basic sentences!
Aisha PZ is the proud mother of two beautiful children and blogs at Boundless Meanderings. This post was originally published at ATP in September 2006.
live in england and i’m 13 years old. my mother and father taught me urdu and i am very grateful for it. It come to great use when i go to pakistan and also in other languages such as french and German. Recently, i also started to read and write which ws very rewarding. In may, i ‘m going to sit my olevel urdu exam and i’m very grateful to my parents. I think every child should learn their native language otherwise they’re being quite ignorant of their culture.
Aisha,
A very revealing post indeed. Pakistani Diaspora is growing by every day, month, year and with it the twin angst of lost roots and heritage is engulfing their minds. Souls like you who care for their heritage and want to transfer your love for your land to their children are increasing every day. When I go back to Pakistan, despite all that is happening there, I feel proud of my city Multan. Its people, its trees, its land and everything associated with it. It is only natural that you want to instil that feeling in your children and your are absolutely right language is the biggest difference or similarity when you go to a new place. If one speaks the language of that place, everything becomes easy. Without learning Urdu, definitely the next generation will be absorbed in the adopted country and the land of Pakistan would be as alien to them as any other foreign land.
I hope that you become successful in your quest and according to my observation the single biggest way to achieve this goal is to take your children frequently back for holidays to Pakistan. There is no other easy solution to this issue.
http://real-politique.blogspot.com
By Sikander Hayat
There is one category that you guys are missing, which is people that speak Urdu fluently but cannot read or write it because their education was all in English (outside of Pakistan).
I have always thought it would be great if someone could publish classic urdu literature in romanized urdu, so I could read it. Obviously not suggesting a replacement for the traditional script but it would be good to have available (Turkey completely changed scripts and there Turkish is dominant language, there is no english-medium elite class).
Lastly, we are not Arabs so please stop the retarded suggestions for adopting Arabic as a language in Pakistan.
I’ m a little disappointed at the responses to your excellent post and reminded again of the Pakistani tendency to dump their identities in order to ‘advance’ by adopting alien identities and languages. There are few other nationalities that go so far to de-emphasize the learning of indigenous languages and cravenly jump on board the English, Arabic, and Persian bandwagons. Why not be proud of the language which comes from the soil of Pakistan and use it with confidence and self-respect? I applaud your desire to teach your children Urdu. Though I live in Switzerland and grew up in Turkey, Brazil, Korea, Thailand, Indonesia, and the United States, I speak fluent Urdu and fluent Siraiki as both my parents were raised in Ahmadpur Sharkia. My four year old son speaks Urdu better than all the other languages combined and I certainly hope he can speak Siraiki, the local Italian, and English. As someone who has lived and traveled worldwide, I’ve noticed that people adopt the language of the culture that they feel is superior. One will notice that the Chinese in Southeast Asia continue to speak Chinese; the Lebanese in West Africa continue to speak Arabic; the Indians in East Africa continue to speak Gujarati, and the Persians in the Gulf or in North America continue to speak their native Farsi. It is Pakistanis, however, who generally abandon their native tongues when arriving in the United States — one will notice that they do not do the same thing when living in Africa or poor regions of Asia. It is the person’s perceptions regarding the relative superiority or inferiority of their native culture that determines whether they hold or abandon their prior linguistic identities and, as the posts prior to mine largely confirm, Pakistanis really do have a deep seated inferiority complex and they will need to come to terms with this problem before we can advance as a a nation.
Eidee Man, What I mentioned is historically correct – the logic put forward by Sir Agha Khan was that because of the multi-lingual nature of the new nation that was sought for the Muslims, Arabic might have been a more unifying language. At that time no body would have opposed it either because of the given rationale. Otherwise, within the context of democracy, Bengali was to become the national language as it was spoken by a majority.
Mullah stuff is new-age nonsense initiated by Zia, supported by CIA for the Afghan war and accelerated by Saudi money after the revolution in Iran. This zeal did not exist in a viral form back in the old days…