Adil Najam
This Father’s Day brings a mixed bunch of feeling for me. I am traveling for work and literally thousands of miles away from my three kids. Missing them, and missing them especially on Father’s Day. There is nothing in the world that compares to parenthood – the greatest of joys, and the greatest of responsibilities!
On the other hand, since I am in Pakistan, I am with my own father on this day; and a time and an age comes when you start cherishing those moments more than you ever did before.
I thought I might put my kids photograph up today. But, actually, those photographs have been up on ATP since Day 1 – if you look at my ‘hum daikhain gay‘ video, the three kids ‘jo daikhain gay‘ who appear right at the beginning, are my own!
So I went back and re-opened the post I had done last Father’s Day. It was not about my kids. It was about the millions of father’s in Pakistan. What I wrote then, I think, is still valid and worth repeating. So, here is the post in full.
I know we are supposed to put cute and cuddly type of stuff on Father’s Day. But being a father is serious business. All the more serious in developing countries like Pakistan.
This picture was taken soon after [the 2005] earthquake, but you can see a scene like this — a desperate father frantically trying to get urgent medical attention for his child — ever day in hospital wards across Pakistan.
Happy Father’s Day, Everyday!
I enjoyed gestures from my kids on father’s day happily and jokingly as their gift only served them more than myself. Nevetheless, let this post not become a popularity contest between the East and the West. Caring for elders is an altruistic act of human nature. I know some people back home who abused their parents and many who valued them. Likewise, recently one of my colleague gave me a tour of his new home and proudly pointed out to a part of the house as his mom’s future home. And from visits to Alzheimer and hospice groups we have see ample examples of how in the West life is valued and nurtured.
There is plenty of good on both sides to learn and emulate.
Happy fathers day!
Don’t cultures evolve over time, anything that brings the family closer is good I guess.
We can talk about dignity of death, hospice care etc, I think these are great concepts which people don’t have in Pakistan. We’ll be also shocked if someone does a study about the neglect & abuse parents get in Pakistan. Its a good idea to celebrate these days if you live in the west. I’m talking about Pakistan. I am not against fathers, I’m against celebrating these days in Pakistan, these are not OUR cultural events. Its a good idea to thank God, should we also celebrate Thanksgiving?(we’ll have to import turkeys). Its good to have fun before you get married, should we also have bachelor parties? Its good to have friends in your wedding, should we also have best man? Its fun to trick-a-treat, should we also celebrate Holoween? I think Eids, chand raat, basant, events in our wedding etc are great celebrations and we should stick to these; instead of following those nations who don’t care about our cultural events.
Father’s day is for those nation who do not know the dignity and respect of parents, we are chasing those nations now, as in all other fields.
I would agree 110% with Ayesha Sajid and Moeen Bhatti, and with all due respect to some extent with Expatriate and Adnan Ahmad, I can understand human emotions are the same all across the globe, but now it is the matter how far do we want to run the rat race, would there be a limit or not.
I want to relate one incident, I was out with few of my foreign friends to a birthday party at beach, my Scottish friend asked me if I would you ever go back to Pakistan, and looking at the vastness of Indian ocean, with not much certainty I said most probably yes, and he said “Yeah you have to take care of your parents we just chuck them in Retirement homesâ€