Hot Off the Urdu Press – 10

Posted on March 17, 2010
Filed Under >Owais Mughal, Media Matters, Urdu
Total Views: 45604

Owais Mughal

A friend of mine had once jokingly told me that

Poetry should be done in no other language than Urdu and news should be reported in no other language than English.

That comment was for lighter moments only but one can see such a stark contrast between Pakistan’s standard of Urdu and English press that at ATP we are now in Part 10 of highlighting these differences. I also want to take just this tid-bit liberty of generalizing that Urdu press stories seem to be cuter and more sensational than their English counterparts in Pakistan. Following is an example of a cute news in Urdu – reported 3 days ago.

(1) Naming Ceremony at Lahore Zoo For the 2 Lion Cubs
The translation goes like this: A ceremony was held at Lahore Zoo to name the two cubs of a Africa babbar lion. What is the English word for babbar? Students from a private school attended the ceremony and named the two cubs as Ricky and Ticky. Father lion’s name is Jumbo and he is fifteen years old. Mother lion’s name is Fairy and she is thirteen.

A lion typically lives up to 12-14 years in the wild and up to 20 years in captivity. The daily food for a lion in Lahore zoo is 8-10 kg of meat and 1 litre of milk. The students also deposited one year worth of food expenses for the new borns with the Zoo administration.

(2) Pakistan is Facing Both Internal and External Threats: says M. Anwar

This one liner heading appeared in Urdu press a few days ago and made me smile. Either Mr. Anwar doesn’t think his audience have decent intellect or the news reporter thinks his/her readership is below par. Every child in Pakistan can tell that country is unfortunately surrounded by both internal and external threats these days. And by the way who is Mohammad Anwar? Ever heard of him?

(3) Japanese School Teaches How to Find a Good Life Partner

This news appeared in dil-chasp-o-ajeeb (Interesting and Strange) section of a Urdu daily. The news starts with a philosophical statement “It is only with (good) luck that one can find a good life partner” and then it continues like this:

There is a unique school in Tokyo which teaches tricks (Urdu word = gur) to people on how to find a good life partner. The ladies are taught habits of correctly walking and talking etc. They are also taught habits with which they can impress their in-laws. So far 30 people have taken admission here. There are separate (Urdu word = makhsoos) classes for gents. They are also taught tricks on how to find a good wife.

(4) Motorway: President, Prime Minister, Chief Ministers and Governers Are Exempt From Over-Speeding Laws.

This news item alone, because of its subject can become a separate post at ATP. Despite all the satire above, I want to credit Urdu press which brought this news into foray before any English daily could. It says that Inspector General of Pakistan Motorway Police has told Public Accounts Committee that President, Prime Minister, Chief Ministers and Governers are exempt from Over-speeding laws on Motorway. This facility has however been taken away from Ministers and other higher ranking officials (aala hukkaam)

This news does bring into light a very potent question of why there are separate laws for common people versus those in power ?

ATPs Other Posts from Urdu Press

1. Hot off the Urdu Press – 1
2 Hot off the Urdu Press – 2
3. Hot off the Urdu Press – 3
4. Hot off the Urdu Press – 5
5. Hot off the Urdu Press – 5
6. Hot off the Urdu Press – 6
7. Hot off the Urdu Press – 7
8. Hot off the Urdu Press – 8
9. Hot off the Urdu Press – 9
10. Pak Cricketer, Bhurban and gorilla andaaz
11. Rehana ka karnama

Related Posts with Thumbnails

13 responses to “Hot Off the Urdu Press – 10”

  1. momers says:

    Motorway speeding allowed:

    The Pres, PM, CM’s and Gov’s. are made of indestructible stuff…in accidents they wont die…and their monster motorcades are so cool that other cars on the motorway traveling at designated speeds wont be affected at aaaalll…no sir!

    Also the Pres, PM, CM’s and Gov’s have super duper S-class’es and 7-series’es and Cygnus’es and these cars are like super duper road magnets and they turn as if on rails…can fly and are so safe they are virtually indestructible too.

    BTW, are only the vehicles in which the Pres, PM, CM’s and Gov’s ride exempted or their motorcades too?!

  2. JJ says:

    great post. this is a trend that i had been noticing for some years. the majority of the excerpts that you have highlighted here have a “cute” tone as mentioned earlier. sadly a lot of content from the urdu press (largely so in smaller publications) is replete with conspiracy theories and fear mongering.
    as expected, many responses to your post indicate that readers have taken offense. this is unfortunate. serious efforts need to be made to ensure the survival of urdu which is threatened by diminishing efficacy to communicate a progressive sentiment.

  3. Owais Mughal says:

    To one of the commentor at facebook, I want to say that these cuttings are from the largest Urdu daily (probably in the world) and not from a tabloid.

  4. More comments from the ATP Facebook Page:

    – “I think people are being needlessly pricklish and self-conscious here. IT says in the very first sentence that it is a “lighter moment”. I can laugh at myself…. unless I have low self-esteem. And I do not. So, lets be more confident in our selves and stop getting all sensitive about anyone saying anything, that is a sign of low self-esteem only.”
    – “Not pricklis, just a little cognisant of the embedded snobbery in the ‘jesting’. Its rather colonial and brown sahib!”
    – “Not sure if it is.
    So, if Jon Stewart in the US points out funny English spoken at Fox News or a British Comedy show makes a skit about misuse of English by BBC, is that “brown sahib” too?
    What is embedded is not snobery, but the low-self-esteem in those commenting. They are themselves not “sure” about themselves, so get all worked up about any hint of attack, even if not intended.
    Its just like how it is the people of weakest faith and worst character are the ones who get most worked up about religion and religious insult. Those whose faith is strong smile it away, knowing that some’s mocking will not change their faith or what is correct. Similarly, those of weak Pakistaniat get worked up about these silly things because they themselves are not confident enough in their identity.”

  5. مدحت علی says:

    ہا ہا ہا۔ میں بھی آجکل یہی کچھ پڑھ کر ہنستا رہتا ہوں۔

    نہ جانے انٹرنیٹ پر فضول خبریں دینے کا کیا مقصد ہے

    کاغذ پر تو کاپی مکمل کرنے کا بہانہ ہوتا ہے

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *